May 10th, 2009 by Terri Barnes in Stars and Stripes column Spouse Calls

Happy Mother’s Day! Whether you’re serving overseas, home with the kids while your husband is deployed, or just maintaining normalcy for your military household, I hope that all you moms out there are receiving some warm fuzzies of appreciation today.

The Mother’s Day edition of the Spouse Calls column is all about the mothers of active duty members. Read it here.

One of the moms who contributed advice for this column was Sandy Doell, an Army mom-turned-author. Her book “Mom’s Field Guide,” offers practical advice, mostly for surviving a son or daughter’s deployment.

“Parents need to be extremely flexible during deployment,” said Sandy, noting the changes happening in your parent/child relationship.

“In addition to watching your child leave home for a dangerous location, you yourself are going through some changes: empty nest syndrome, menopause, and other changes associated with midlife. The parents I know who managed this time the best did positive productive things for themselves.”

Attention to one’s own personal development has benefits to parent and child, she said. There is more to a person than parenthood, and there should be more to a relationship with an adult child than caretaking and worry making.

“You don’t want him to call you and hang up thinking how hard it is to talk to you because you are so worried about him,” Sandy said. “You want him to hang up the phone and turn to his buddy and say something like, ‘Wow, my mom just got an A on her first college paper.’”

Sandy’s book is available in print or as an e-book at

http://www.momsfieldguide.com/

More resources for the parents of military members:

• http://somesoldiersmom.blogspot.com/
• http://www.proudarmyparents.com/
• http://www.goarmyparents.com/
• http://www.navy-parents.com/bb/index.php
• http://www.usmcparents.com/forum/default_group.asp
• http://www.navyformoms.com/group/navyparents
• http://www.militarymoms.net/
• http://groups.yahoo.com/group/airforcemomsanddads2/

Technorati Tags: Mom's Field Guide, Sandy Doell, What You Need to Know to Make It Through Your Loved One's Military Deployment